Beginning shidduchim can be both exhilarating and nerve-racking. It requires a deliberate decision to start a new chapter full of uncertainty. The individual embarking on shidduchim may feel anxious and usually turns to those close to him for support and guidance. I want to explore the delicate balance between the individual’s role and his mentors’ roles in decision-making about dating. As a rebbe of boys, I will focus on a boy’s experience in shidduchim, though the same principles apply equally to girls.

Rav Shlomo Wolbe, zt”l, writes at the end of his sefer, Z’ria U’binyan B’chinuch (adapted into English as Planting and Building: Raising a Jewish Child), that a boy should not be told that it is time to start shidduchim if the boy himself does not feel ready. Conversely, Rav Wolbe adds, he should not be discouraged from beginning shidduchim at a younger age (his example is 19) if he says he is ready and wants to start.

These directives from Rav Wolbe shed new light on chinuch in general, and shidduchim in particular. As parents, we naturally want what is best for our children, but as outsiders, we only possess an external vantage point. In yeshivish circles, most boys begin shidduchim at about age 23, as before this, they may lack the maturity or emotional development needed to responsibly undertake the practical, financial, and emotional aspects of marriage and family. On the other hand, it may be unwise to delay dating beyond that age when their peers are already starting to get married. There is a fear that younger girls may perceive them as too old, or that people may wonder if something is wrong with them for delaying dating. These are all valid considerations; thus, most well-intentioned parents and mentors in yeshivish circles advise against dating before age 22 and discourage delaying dating until after age 24.

As the saga continues with my newly acquired (and now much-loved) flip phone, I’ve rediscovered using a planner. Remember those beloved date books we used to use once upon a time? Those dog-eared organizers that contained everything pertinent, from dentist’s appointments to shopping lists and everything in between. Well, once I said good-bye to my smart calendar, I needed another way to organize my life. I was pleased at first when I saw the calendar on my new flip phone and envisioned that life would go on as usual. What I didn’t account for was that this new calendar was teeny tiny and nothing like my old one. What’s one to do? Thankfully, I looked around and discovered an organizer that was better than those other ones from yesteryear.

This new calendar is pocket-sized for one thing, and it contains organized places for everything I need like grandchildren’s birthdays, an Omer countdown, and of course my treasured to-do lists. I must admit, though, that it took some time to get used to it. I had to remember to put it into my purse when leaving the house and take it out when I returned home. But not to worry. I caught on rather quickly because there’s just something about check lists. It’s that instant feeling of accomplishment for a job well done. It’s a geshmakte feeling, plain and simple.

If you have a child who was born in 2016 and on, there is money sitting on the table with their name on it. All you have to do is claim it.

A new type of investment account called a Trump Account (officially a Section 530A account) was created by the One Big Beautiful Bill Act (OBBBA), signed into law on July 4, 2025. These are tax-advantaged accounts designed to give American children a headstart on long-term financial security. The initial federal money as well as subsequent contributions are invested in low-cost U.S. equity index funds and locked in until your child turns 18.

Here’s the short version: the federal government is giving away $1,000 per child for babies born between 2025 and 2028, and tech billionaire Michael Dell is putting up $250 per child for kids born 2016 through 2024. This is real, free money. And some of it is first-come, first-served.

The $1,000 Federal Contribution: Is Your Child Eligible?

Under a pilot program established by the OBBBA (IRC 6434), the U.S. Treasury will make a one-time $1,000 contribution to the Trump Account of every eligible child who meets all of the following:

Last month in Israel, we got to experience something unique to this country and something that every Jew should be very proud of. In a two-day stretch, Israel does what Jews have done for millennia – turn sorrow into joy like no other people in the world – and it began with Yom Hazikaron, the Day of Remembrance. It is a time when the people of the entire country stop whatever they are doing and pay tribute to those who have paid the ultimate price, who died al Kiddush Hashem defending our holy land. It is a chance to recognize the sacrifice of soldiers and their families as well as victims of Arab terror so that we can live in this land as a free, sovereign people. Most will be taking the time for hakaras hatov – recognizing the good that has been and continues to be done for us by those we have lost, those who keep us safe, and most of all, the Creator of All Things.

A Book Review

What does it mean to be a bar mitzva? How does one keep up the momentum long after they reach the age of 13? What are the obligations of a girl who becomes bat mitzva? These questions and more are thoroughly explored and answered in the newest book by Rabbi Yehoshua Alt, Phenomenal Insights about Bar Mitzva and Tefillin (2026). Rabbi Alt* gathers insights from throughout the Torah to present more than 50 engaging essays on the significance of becoming bar mitzva and tefillin. Written in a clear and accessible style, this book is suitable for Jews of all ages and makes a wonderful bar mitzva present. The insights, including the source of the bar mitzva “pshetel” (speech), can be a valuable resource for speeches by bar mitzva boys, parents, and rabbanim alike.

The book also features inspiring stories, such as that of a man approaching the age of 105 who decided to put on tefillin for the very first time, inspiring a pre-med student to begin as well. As the student put it: “If a man can begin putting on tefillin at 105, why shouldn’t I start now? Why wait until I’m 105?” We also learn what happens to the soul when a boy becomes bar mitzva. For some people, the significance of a bar mitzva might only be revealed later. Still, it is always worthwhile to prepare well before one becomes a gadol. This book allows one to do just that.

Sleep is very important and is, along with nutrition and exercise, a foundation of health and wellness.

Besides allowing the body to rest and recharge, there are certain critical functions that the brain conducts during sleep. Sleep gives the brain a chance to repair itself and remove toxins that have accumulated during the day. It plays a crucial role in consolidating memories by converting newly acquired information into long-term memory. Adequate sleep also helps to regulate our emotions; a lack of sleep can cause irritability, mood swings, and reacting emotionally. Less than an optimal amount of sleep can also lead to decreased concentration, lowered attention span, and cause problems with learning. It can lead to decreased focus, depression, feeling tired, weight gain, and diminished performance at work.

Regarding the unexpected effect on weight, interestingly, research has shown that the amount of sleep that we get at night affects the amount and types of food we eat during the day. Lack of sleep is associated with an increased desire for high calorie foods, and the more sleep deprived we are, the stronger the craving. One study showed that, compared to people who slept nine hours, those who only slept four hours consumed 300 extra calories the next day (Am J Clin Nutr 2011; 94 (2):410-416).

Research has also shown that people who are sleep deprived have a higher amount of stress. This could be related to a lack of energy leading to a decreased desire to exercise, and it is known that exercise relieves stress. Other possible effects of insufficient sleep include high blood pressure, diabetes, stroke, depression, and impairment of the immune system (J Immunology.214;(3) 3/2025.347-359).

by Dalya Attar

Dear Baltimore Community,

I recently saw a phrase being used regarding the upcoming election that stuck with me:

“Act now, or don’t complain later.”

The more I thought about it, the more I realized how perfectly it applies to this election.

Over the past several months, I have heard a consistent message from our Rabbanim and community leaders: Vote. I’ve heard speeches about it. I’ve received calls about it. I’ve listened to Rabbanim emphasize it from the pulpit. In fact, I’ve even heard some say that just as we are careful to eat kosher, we have an obligation to participate in elections that directly impact our community.

The message could not be clearer.

But if everyone understands the importance of voting, then why do we keep repeating it?

The answer is simple: Because too many people still do not vote.

And in an election that is expected to be one of the closest our community has seen, that reality matters more than ever.

by Chavi Horowitz

Many years ago, I taught Hebrew school in Randallstown, Maryland. In my class was a young man from a completely irreligious background who had a very illustrious last name in Lithuanian Orthodox circles. Clearly, this young man was a scion of one of the most famous families of Torah luminaries in the last 200 years. It was painful to see how ignorant he was of his heritage and neither knew nor cared about Judaism in any way. Fast forward many years. A young woman came looking for

by R. Kay

There are several situations in life that chazal refer to as “kasheh k’krias yam suf.”  One is finding a match and another is Parnassa.  The common denominator is the sense of desperation we sometimes feel in these situations, and, after our tefillos are answered, the recognition that the (sometimes highly improbable) circumstances that converged to bring about the Yeshua were Divinely orchestrated. 

Interestingly, these two challenges go hand in hand when financial arrangements for the wedding and support for the newlyweds cause new financial pressures. This is more than likely for a typical frum family with children close in age who get married in rapid succession.

Unfortunately, community standards have risen over the past several decades, and it has become increasingly difficult to stick to the timeless values that our grandparents lived by, such as “Don’t spend more than you can afford,” and “Keep your eyes on your own plate.” To be fair, the main reason middle-class simchas these days are not as simple as they used to be is probably because life itself is not as simple as it used to be. Our lives are much more hectic, and many of us are stretched to our limits by our daily obligations. Therefore, putting together a nice family Shabbos for the aufruf or Shabbos sheva brachos usually requires some level of outsourcing, which has raised the price – and the bar.

Regardless of the challenges involved, many people who were not blessed with wealth make several chasanas within a few years. How is that possible?

When I was young, we used to play a game called Telephone. One person whispered a sentence in the ear of the person next to her, and that person passed it down the line. The fun of the game was to hear the final message, which was always very different from the original one.

The same misunderstandings happen in the real world when telephone, text, and email messages – even face-to-face conversations – get muddled when repeated from one person to another. Whether it is a typo in a text or ambiguous words that are misinterpreted or simply because people sometimes hear what they want to hear, the result is the same: the speaker’s intent doesn’t come through.

You might think that communication in our digital age would be an improvement over the past. But, although everyone today has their own phone and can be reached wherever they are, our instantaneous digital conversations have their downsides. You can’t read the other person’s body language when texting or emailing, so you miss cues to understanding. Emojis are a poor substitute. Texts, especially, are usually written in a hurry and are often misunderstood. Sometimes people even send a text or email to the wrong person! When people talk face to face, at least you can see the other person’s expressions and reactions. Yet, even that is not enough.