The roar of the battlefield, the cries of the wounded, the
alarming wail of a siren, and the screams of those running for safety are
sounds and noises that have rocked our country now for over two years.
Cries
of joy, the sound of glass being broken by a chuppa, the blasting noise from a
lively band are also part of our daily life.
And
then there are silent cries in the dark of night. Each heart beats in its
unique wave of pain. Choked-up cries, tearful songs of faith and goodness are
also part of our nation.
We
are a resilient nation, beaten by both personal tragedies and suffering and national
level struggles and battles. Churban Habayit took place almost 2,000
years ago, but the destruction, its repercussions, and its tikkun are
taking place in every generation.
I
present to you a story. It is a personal story, a story that contains almost
every cry, noise, and sound imaginable – a story of resilience, faith, strength,
and incredible giving that shapes the individual who has chosen, while walking
the path of suffering, to lift her head and light up our world. The message in
this story will penetrate our emotions, shape our decisions, and speed up Geulah.
* * *
For
those who do not know me, I was born and raised in Baltimore, attended Bais
Yaakov, and then fulfilled my dream and made aliyah after several years
of working in chinuch in Baltimore. A few years later, I fulfilled my
second dream and married my husband, Eliyahu Shai, originally from Yehud, a
town close to the Ben Gurion airport.
It takes time to
get to know a spouse’s relatives, and since we don’t live near Eliyahu’s
family, there is little opportunity to meet up with them. A short while ago, however,
I discovered two heroes. Just as a diamond glistens and shines after being cut
and ground, so too, the heroes in this story have been tested with unfathomable
pain and suffering – not once but twice.
My husband’s
oldest nephew, Ariel, married Salome a bit before Eliyahu and I celebrated our
own wedding about six-and-a-half years ago. Like many religious guys, Ariel
joined the IDF through a hesder yeshiva a year after he got married.
When war broke out on October 7th, Ariel had already finished his
army service but was called up for miluim at 9:00 on that morning of
Simchat Torah. As a commander in the Givati unit, Ariel sped along the roads
swarming with terrorists to reach his army base in Tzehilim, a short distance
from Gaza, leaving behind Salome with their two young children. Like many on
that fateful day, Salome feared for her husband’s safety and wondered if she
would ever see him again. “We understood that this is what we needed to do,” Salome
recalls. “This was the reason he had undergone his army training all these
years.”
Three months into
the war, on a Wednesday, Ariel surprised his family with a two-hour visit.
Ariel’s friend was supposed to go for this short leave, but he gave it to
Ariel. Little did Ariel know that this would be the last time he would see his
son alive. Dovid Eitan was all 14 months old. One day later, Dovid Eitan
started to feel sick and came down with a low-grade fever. Salome gave him
medicine to relieve his fever, and indeed his fever went down. He played a
little more, nursed, and slept through the night. In the morning while he was
sleeping, he suddenly turned blue and stopped breathing. Emergency responders
came, and he was whisked away to Assuta Hospital, where his death was
pronounced. Meanwhile, Ariel was on his way home that Friday morning for a
longer visit, only to find his son in an ambulance upon arrival. A few days
later, the doctors informed the grieving parents that the cause of Dovid’s
passing was a rare bacterial infection that went to the brain.
*
* *
During the shiva,
as I sat beside Salome and listened to her speak with the other visitors, I was
struck by her noble, dignified appearance. I said the tefilla at the end
of my visit and gave her a hug, but I wished in my heart that there was
something I could do to relieve some of her pain. Blessed with an extremely
supportive family and community in Givat Washington, where they live, Salome
continued to manage her schedule as an eim bayit and kitchen
manager.
Recently, in an
interview with a popular news site, Arutz 14, Salome was asked how she grappled
with her feelings. She explained, “My fear all the time was for my husband’s
safety, and all of a sudden this happens to my son.” She then described how,
when she got up from shiva, her husband was still in miluim, leaving
her with her baby daughter alone without Dovid. “This was a year that we had to
learn to breathe all over again, to get up and learn to live in a world where he
was no longer here.” Salome continues, “We were able to keep going. The power
of life is stronger.”
A year later, this
power of life was fought for in another battle, this time for Ariel and
Salome’s four-year-old daughter, Ya’ale Tama, who was diagnosed with leukemia.
Salome shared on Arutz 14, “I don’t ask why; I ask what I have to do to change,
to make things better in this world. What do I have to learn from this?”
With her
indomitable spirit and enthusiastic energy, Salome has been involved with
making this world a better place from her teenage years. As a teen, she joined
an organization called Misamchei Dovid, whose mission was to celebrate with
those who didn’t have family and friends to celebrate with. She remembers one
incredible wedding where the chatan and kallah were both baalei
teshuva whose family and friends were not religious and couldn’t relate to
their desire to have separate dancing.
In came Salome
with a group of religious teens, who danced through the night and taught the
wedding participants how joyful and lively a religious wedding can be! As the
only ones dancing with the kallah on her wedding night, Salome and her friends
forged a deep connection with this young lady and, even after the wedding,
remained connected by a WhatsApp group where updates and photos are shared.
Salome eventually
became the director of Misamchei Dovid, the organization she had initially
volunteered for. Although their service was to bring simcha on the dance floor,
many needy people turned to them for financial aid as well. Salome wished to
help, and with much effort, she single-handedly provided for the people who
were turning to her. One outstanding case was an olah chadasha (new
immigrant) from France who had made aliyah by herself and finished high
school in Israel. After she completed 12th grade, she wanted to get
married but didn’t have any money, family support, or even the language and
work experience.
Salome arranged the wedding, but the night before it was to
take place, military clashes broke out in Gaza, and it was forbidden to have
the wedding in the designated hall. Salome had just given birth to her first
child, but not willing to leave the couple to fend for themselves, she traveled
with her two-week-old baby searching for a hall at the last minute. She was able
to find a hall hours before the wedding was to take place, and indeed, it was a
beautiful celebration.
*
* *
During the
exhausting hospital stays at Shneider Children’s Hospital, where Ya’ale was
undergoing chemo treatments, Salome used whatever strength she had left to push
forward the dream she had thought about three years ago, before Dovid’s passing:
helping others celebrate when they had no means to put together a simcha. She started
a nonprofit, naming it “Lev Eitan,” l’ilui nishmat her son Dovid Eitan.
Time passed and
Ya’ale was in Shneider undergoing treatments for a week, in a difficult
condition. On Thursday of that week, Dovid Eitan would have celebrated his
three-year-old birthday with a chalaka, the traditional first haircut.
Salome could not consider forgoing the event, and although he was absent, she
threw together a grand event. The event featured 40 men who donated blood, 40
women who donated hair, and a large fun and play space for children. The almost
7,000 shekels that were raised went to support “Lev Eitan.” Salome was on a
high.
The next day,
Friday, Ariel and Salome did something that was not customary for them. Until
that point, Salome was the one to stay in the hospital with Ya’ale while she
was undergoing treatments, and Ariel would care for their baby Noga at home.
Salome describes the separation from her husband and baby as the most difficult
part of the ordeal. On Shabbatot, Ariel and Noga would stay near the hospital
to spend time with Salome and Ya’ale. But this Friday was different. With
Ya’ale’s condition not looking good, the couple left their baby with Salome’s
parents and were 100% present for Ya’ale together.
After Shabbat
began, the worst thing imaginable happened. The same bacterial infection that
had caused Dovid Eitan’s death, suddenly viciously attacked Ya’ale. The alarmed
couple was facing this crisis all alone, standing outside the closed doors of
the ICU, where Ya’ale was rushed. It was only hours after Dovid Eitan’s
would-be birthday celebration. There is no coincidence in the world, and Salome
felt that something eerie and supernatural was going on.
Ariel and Salome
flipped through their Shabbat siddurim to find perakim of tehillim
to say, but, in their distraught state, the words were getting all tangled up in
their mouths. Crying out of fear and desperation, Salome knew she must try
something else. She and Ariel got up and began to sing and dance to the popular
Israeli song, “Od Tov Yoter” – it will be good and more good. A few
hours later, the doctors came from the ICU to inform Ariel and Salome that
their daughter was stabilized, and her life was saved.
*
* *
This past May,
Ya’ale was, baruch Hashem, finished with her treatments in the hospital
and was even able to return to gan after Pesach. Salome explains that
she will be taking oral chemo from home for one year. The couple have plans to
leave their home in Givat Washington and be part of building up an agricultural
moshav in the Jordan Valley, close to the border of Jordan.
Looking back,
Salome feels that, during that fearsome night when Ya’ale was in the ICU, Dovid
Eitan had made a lot of noise up in Shamayim on behalf of his big sister. Salome
now wants to channel all that noise to bring the sound of joy to others. To
allow her organization “Lev Eitan” to move forward in a meaningful way, she has
started a campaign, naming it “Ra’ash shel Simcha,” sounds of joy.
The money raised
in the campaign will go towards funding the large cost of building a website to
allow those lacking the funds anywhere in the country to receive substantial
discounts from services, such as caterers, bands, and make-up artists to turn
their simcha into a truly joyous celebration. In addition, the money raised
will be stored in a fund and allotted to those who don’t have even the basics
to get started in making a simcha. It is important to be aware that Salome only
accepts cases of those who have been verified by the welfare department and
Bituach Leumi (National Services) as being legitimate.
When I heard that
Salome was starting Ra’ash shel Simcha, I jumped aboard, thankful that
at last I can fulfill my wish at the shiva call over two years ago and
offer my nephew and niece support and a ray of light. I am grateful to anyone
who can join me and donate to this organization. Together we will be part of
lighting up others’ lives with the sounds of joy!
To donate, please go to https://charidy.com/davideitan/sarabracha
