For the past four years, Yonatan Grinberg has been connecting Baltimore’s Torah community with classical music and changing lives for the better. Mr. Grinberg’s fledgling after-school program, Baltimore Bows, has outgrown its space and is now a part of CEMA, the Chamber Encounters Music Academy. CEMA offers music instruction both after and during school hours, teaches at all levels and to all ages, and gives stunning educational concerts at the Gordon Center. As Mr. Grinberg says, “The Baltimore community recognized the many intellectual, emotional, and spiritual benefits of serious music instruction for both children and adults and has been supportive of our growth.”

The support started as soon as the Grinbergs moved to Baltimore. “In many communities, when I tell people I’m a musician, they say, ‘What can you do with that?’ says Mr. Grinberg, “but when I moved to Baltimore they asked, ‘Can you teach my children?’” And with that, Baltimore Bows was launched, in 2014, with only 16 students.

Rabbi Nachman Seltzer’s recent rare U.S. speaking tour, including numerous appearances in Baltimore, presented me with the opportunity to meet one of the most accomplished writers and inspirational speakers in the Torah world today. Rabbi Seltzer has impressively authored 28 books in the past 17 years, in addition to other important pursuits. It was a pleasure to chat with a kindred spirit in this exclusive Where What When interview

Where are you from originally and where do you live now?

I’m originally from Brooklyn. My parents made aliya when I was 14. Presently, my wife and I and our four kids, ka”h – two girls and two boys, aged 16, 15, 12, and 9 – live in Ramat Beit Shemesh.

I understand that you had no formal training in writing. When did you start writing and what was your career path?

I wrote in elementary school, but at age 23 – not having gone to high school or studied writing – I decided to write my first book. One motzei Shabbos, in Har Nof, I said to my mother-in-law, ‘I want to write a book.’ She said, “Here’s a pad of paper and a pen,” and I started writing my first book, The Edge. It was based on a story that a friend told me while I was in kollel about a friend of his. I wrote four pages a day, by hand, for the next three or four months, and then I had a book.

 “I grew up in the ’60s, a time when everyone was finding their way,” reminisces Rabbi Sholom Weingot. “Because I was always very individualistic, even as a yeshiva bachur, I learned to also look at other people as unique individuals and try to understand their needs.”

This statement revealed to me where Rabbi Weingot was coming from. The director of Bnainu, a Baltimore-based organization that provides chinuch (Jewish education) services for children and families, Rabbi Weingot held an intimate meeting this July for a core group of women. He hopes to spread his simple yet revolutionary grassroots movement as widely as possible. Its purpose? To reach deeper levels of communications and promote listening on a higher level.

About 20 years ago, under the Clinton administration, the country took a turn toward paying for college – that is, helping to pay for it via an income tax credit. This was named The Hope credit, and it allowed undergraduate students to save taxes based on college tuition. However, you could only claim the credit for two tax years. Our attitude at the time, therefore, was to not delve into complicated issues. With the many questions surrounding yeshivas and Israel programs, we simply waited to use the credit until the student was attending a “real college,” when there were no doubts.  

Ten years ago, however, the tax credit was renamed the American opportunity tax credit (AOTC) and extended to four tax years. This forced some important questions and issues, especially in the frum world. So, this article is 10 years overdue – but better late than never.

Consider these facts:

• Many people in our community have large families.
• Parents consider a Jewish day school education for each of their children to be a non-negotiable necessity.
• Schools grow to accommodate the increasing numbers of school-age children yet cannot make ends meet through fundraising alone, requiring ever-growing sums from parents in the form of tuition.
• It is impossible for the majority of the parent body to pay full tuition, and paying even the reduced amount is a struggle for many.

The only thing that seems to fluctuate faster than the stock market is one’s ratings as a mother. It seems that the qualifications of motherhood cover a very wide range. In fact, that range includes everything, leaving me and fellow mothers to being rated on multiple levels. Here is an exhausting though not exhaustive glimpse at some of the categories on which one’s success in motherhood hinges: intelligence, fashion, cooking, carpool, candy, and yes, even the frequency with which one requires her children to shower.

This all came to my attention many years ago when visiting with a friend. Without warning, her sweet toddler’s delight at receiving a delicious brownie turned into anger when her mother refused to allow her to grind it into the carpet. In response to this absurd limitation that was being imposed, the little girl pushed away her mother’s hand and exclaimed in anger, “No like you!” Believe it or not, my friend was thrilled. She and I had just had the honor of hearing her daughter’s first complete sentence. Without a moment’s hesitation, my friend called her husband, who quickly called his parents, who immediately called every person they knew in Brooklyn. In addition to witnessing someone celebrating a developmental milestone with an entire borough of New York, it was also my first inkling that the fluctuation in “motherhood ratings” might eventually put the Dow Jones Industrial Average to shame.

Just in time for Rosh Hashanah, we have some honey-filled recipes to use up all our honey – when we’re not dipping apples into it or spreading it on challa.

Honey Glazed Meatballs

These mouth-watering meatballs are saucy, sweet, and tangy, with a hint of umami. I like to serve this recipe with rice and it can be doubled. If we’re in a party mood, we eat these meatballs with toothpicks or skewers.
 
2 large eggs

1 c. corn flake crumbs

1/2 to 1 c. finely chopped onion

2 tsp. salt

2 lbs. ground beef

4 cloves garlic, minced

1 T. oil

3/4 c. ketchup

1/2 c. honey

3 T. soy sauce

Pre-heat oven to 400°. In a large bowl, mix eggs and add corn flake crumbs, onions, and salt. Crumble beef over mixture and mix well. Shape into 1-inch balls. Place on sprayed racks in shallow baking pans. Bake, uncovered for 12-15 minutes or until meat is no longer pink.

Meanwhile, in a large saucepan, sauté garlic in oil until tender. Stir in the ketchup, honey, and soy sauce. Bring to a boil. Reduce heat; cover and simmer for 5 minutes. Drain meatballs; add to sauce. Carefully stir to evenly coat. Simmer for 5-10 minutes to blend the flavors.

In case you missed the Staples ads, back-to-school season has come. Do the following comments sound familiar?

• “My son was out of the class more than he was in last year. I’m really nervous about this coming year.”
• “First grade! She’s a baby. How can they put her behind a desk!”
• “Middle school is so different. I’m nervous my son won’t be able to handle it.”
• “My daughter thrives in camp. Why can’t school be more like camp?”

If this is what parents are saying, we can only imagine what our children are feeling about going back to school. How can we, as parents, help our children have a successful and happy school year? What does it even mean to be successful? And, by the way, remind me: Why are we doing this to our kids – again? Torture is banned in all first-world countries.

So what happens when you have 45 people – including a Bubby (me) and Zeidy, 24 children under the age of 12, four teenagers, and seven young married couples – who want to spend time together, feel that they “did something” this summer, and create a feeling of solidarity among family members. And you are on a tight budget!?

We pondered and chewed on this question on and off over the year. One of the solutions we came up with was that we would win the lottery, and then we’d rent a beautiful place in the North of Israel, with cute little cabins (one for each family) and a private swimming pool – maybe even with a stable of fun horses. Another creative solution involved staying home and dreaming about the first solution. But we already tried that one year and didn’t find it so satisfying, so this year we thought we would do something new.

The Gemara (Taanis 22a) tells us how Rabbi Beroka asked Eliyahu Hanavi, “Who in this marketplace is a ben Olam Haba?” Eliyahu pointed to two men, explaining that they had a direct ticket to the World to Come. Curious as to what made them worthy of such definite reward, Rabbi Beroka asked the men what they do. They replied that they make jokes and bring joy and happiness to people.

Michelle Jakobovits, a close neighbor and cousin of mine, who passed away on Tuesday July 10, 2018, was like the two men singled out by Eliyahu Hanavi, for she was always bringing joy and simcha to others. Michelle was overflowing with ahavas Yisrael, and this love was felt by all those privileged to come into her orbit – family, friends, neighbors, coworkers, and, really, any member of klal Yisrael. This manifested itself in the simchos she participated in wholeheartedly, the many organizations she involved herself in and even helped directly, the shiva houses she managed, as well as her ordinary day-to-day interactions.