The school year is finally over and it’s been a wild ride. The typical school graduation – on a stage, in caps and gowns – is no more. In the upside-down world we are now experiencing, some of our local schools nevertheless managed to make graduations and end-of-the-year parties special for their students. I was blown away by the creativity, love, and enthusiasm that the teachers and staff put into making sure that no one would feel they were missing something. In reality, it may have been more fun than in a regular year!

Did you know that it is a faux pas to accept a gift when it is first offered, that you must wait until the giver offers it at least three times?

Did you know that if you finish all the food on your plate your host might be insulted as it is a sign that you did not get enough to eat?

Did you know that if your host serves you a full cup of tea instead of half a cup, it means he wants you to leave?

If you never heard of these rules of etiquette, you are not a discourteous boor. You simply do not live in China, Kazakhstan, or Korea, where these customs are understood and practiced. Every society has its own rules, and people who are brought up within it know them intuitively. An outsider is clueless and, although well-intentioned, will seem impolite.

Pesach alone? By yourself? Just your immediate family? No grandparents, no cousins, no guests? No grandchildren to ask the Ma Nishtana? How weird? Nobody could imagine that happening. But this year, it actually did, and many of us were surprised to find it an overall good experience.

Young Couples Stayed Home

Thousands of young couples who did not expect to be leading their own Seder for another few years found themselves leading one this year. For some, it was hard to believe. “You mean I have to clean the refrigerator, kasher the oven and the sink, cover the counters, and cook!? You mean I have to buy pots and pans and every kind of kitchen utensil? Help! Impossible!” Next came the frantic phone calls to Mommy and the Star-K.

It’s hard to believe that here we are in May of 2020 and no child in Baltimore is in school – from kollel members to teenage yeshiva boys to girls whose seminary year in Israel was aborted, all the way down to kindergarteners and preschoolers in playgroup. It’s almost like science fiction, a world turned upside down! This is completely unexpected, so schools were caught completely unprepared.

To find out how the new arrangements are working out, I spoke to a handful of teachers, parents, and students. It is not possible to generalize, of course, because each school is dealing with the situation in its own way, and within each school, the teachers are not the same. While I got many varied responses, the one point that was clear across the board is that each family is different. What works for one family may not work for another. Moreover, the situation is evolving as time goes on.

We are in the season of Yetzias Mitzrayim, when we talk about leaving Egypt and slavery and gaining freedom. Sometimes people experience their own personal Mitzrayim. But when one chooses to rise above their circumstances, however troubled, and, instead of giving up and blaming their failures on their past, makes a better future, this essentially is their own private Yetzias Mitzrayim

I had the privilege of interviewing Mrs. Faigy Rabinowitz, the wife of Rabbi Pinchas Rabinowitz, director of Bikur Cholim. Faigy is an LCPC-licensed mental health counselor and an example of someone who experienced a Yetzias Mitzrayim of her own. She went from growing up in an orphanage in Meah Shearim to living a fulfilling life as a wife, mother, and successful professional in Baltimore.

In a mother’s womb, twins had a conversation.

One asked the other, “Do you believe in life after delivery?”

The other replied, “Why, of course. There has to be something after delivery. Maybe we are here to prepare ourselves for what we will be later.”

“Nonsense” said the first. “There is no life after delivery. What kind of life would that be?”

The second said, “I don’t know, but it will be lighter than here. Maybe we will walk with our legs and eat from our mouths. Maybe we will have other senses that we can’t understand now.”