Page 114 - issue
P. 114
Sock It to Me
Camp Oh Boy! ©WWW unmatched socks that are experiencing separation anxiety
from their “sole” mates, warrants a long-term, analytical
For boys going into pre-1A approach. The first step is to analyze how and when socks are
removed. Some family members might take their socks off
and 1st grade after having settled in for the night, using the right toe/left toe
method of sock removal. If this is the case, any stray socks
• 6027 Woodcrest Ave. 21209 should be hiding between the folds of the bedcovers or on the
• Tuesday, June 27-August 22 floor around the perimeter of the bed. Unfortunately, the
• Monday-Thursday: 9:45-3:00, socks don’t seem to know this. Despite the laws of nature,
socks seem to be mobile even when there is no foot inside.
Friday: 9:45-1:00 They seem to migrate under the bed, across the room and
• Early and late stay available sometimes as far as the hallway before being captured and
• $85 a week + $25 supply fee thrown into the laundry pile. Many a sock has been lost by the
• Sibling Special! Send 2 of unsuspecting foot. Needless to say, a sock GPS would certain-
ly be a welcome invention. Another method of sock removal,
your kids and get $80 a week as employed by some of the younger members of a house-
for each! hold, is to fling the offending article across the room once it’s
been removed. This often results in a game of hide-and-seek,
For more information or to since no two self-respecting socks would ever dream of land-
register, call or email: ing in the same spot. In fact, I once found a sock dangling
Rivka Garry: 410-358-0625 from the blade of a ceiling fan. (Talk about air freshener.)
Chaya Yehudis Sax: 410-602-2059
Shira Mencer: 410-363-8439 Once the techniques are determined and the offending
Rachel Garry: rachelgarry1999@gmail.com parties are identified, persuasive techniques (aka bribes) are
imperative in getting everyone on board with the sock proj-
ect. For younger members, a chart with a treat dangling at the
end seems to do the trick. For older members, positive rein-
forcement might be a little harder to determine, but let’s face
it, everyone has their price. Just make sure that it doesn’t
exceed the national budget. To further engender unity and
sportsmanship for your sock-a-thon, a team T-shirt reading
“Sock It to Me” is also advised.
After establishing my team, an official search-and-seizure
operation was scheduled. The timing of this, so close to
Pesach, was an added bonus as it was sure to uncover a
Cheerio or two. My search patrol looked under furniture,
moved beds, swept under hard-to-reach places, sifted through
dresser drawers, and excavated all nooks and crannies. An
impressive total of 147 unmatched socks were recovered.
They were then brought to the sock recovery center (the liv-
ing room) to be sorted and reunited with their former mates.
With excitement and enthusiasm, we set out to pair our new
long lost members with the 316.8 current members of the
Sock Straggler Society.
After hours of intense labor, in an unprecedented event in
the history of mankind, we have established the first house-
hold to have carefully sorted and identified a combined total
463.8 socks – the original 316.8 stragglers plus an addition-
al 147 socks that were located during our search and seizure
mission – that have absolutely no match. They’re all going in
the garbage along with the three Cheerios that were behind
the couch. On the bright side, I suddenly realized that,
thanks to The Great Sock Hunt, my Pesach cleaning for this
year is done as well! ◆
106 u www.wherewhatwhen.com u
Camp Oh Boy! ©WWW unmatched socks that are experiencing separation anxiety
from their “sole” mates, warrants a long-term, analytical
For boys going into pre-1A approach. The first step is to analyze how and when socks are
removed. Some family members might take their socks off
and 1st grade after having settled in for the night, using the right toe/left toe
method of sock removal. If this is the case, any stray socks
• 6027 Woodcrest Ave. 21209 should be hiding between the folds of the bedcovers or on the
• Tuesday, June 27-August 22 floor around the perimeter of the bed. Unfortunately, the
• Monday-Thursday: 9:45-3:00, socks don’t seem to know this. Despite the laws of nature,
socks seem to be mobile even when there is no foot inside.
Friday: 9:45-1:00 They seem to migrate under the bed, across the room and
• Early and late stay available sometimes as far as the hallway before being captured and
• $85 a week + $25 supply fee thrown into the laundry pile. Many a sock has been lost by the
• Sibling Special! Send 2 of unsuspecting foot. Needless to say, a sock GPS would certain-
ly be a welcome invention. Another method of sock removal,
your kids and get $80 a week as employed by some of the younger members of a house-
for each! hold, is to fling the offending article across the room once it’s
been removed. This often results in a game of hide-and-seek,
For more information or to since no two self-respecting socks would ever dream of land-
register, call or email: ing in the same spot. In fact, I once found a sock dangling
Rivka Garry: 410-358-0625 from the blade of a ceiling fan. (Talk about air freshener.)
Chaya Yehudis Sax: 410-602-2059
Shira Mencer: 410-363-8439 Once the techniques are determined and the offending
Rachel Garry: rachelgarry1999@gmail.com parties are identified, persuasive techniques (aka bribes) are
imperative in getting everyone on board with the sock proj-
ect. For younger members, a chart with a treat dangling at the
end seems to do the trick. For older members, positive rein-
forcement might be a little harder to determine, but let’s face
it, everyone has their price. Just make sure that it doesn’t
exceed the national budget. To further engender unity and
sportsmanship for your sock-a-thon, a team T-shirt reading
“Sock It to Me” is also advised.
After establishing my team, an official search-and-seizure
operation was scheduled. The timing of this, so close to
Pesach, was an added bonus as it was sure to uncover a
Cheerio or two. My search patrol looked under furniture,
moved beds, swept under hard-to-reach places, sifted through
dresser drawers, and excavated all nooks and crannies. An
impressive total of 147 unmatched socks were recovered.
They were then brought to the sock recovery center (the liv-
ing room) to be sorted and reunited with their former mates.
With excitement and enthusiasm, we set out to pair our new
long lost members with the 316.8 current members of the
Sock Straggler Society.
After hours of intense labor, in an unprecedented event in
the history of mankind, we have established the first house-
hold to have carefully sorted and identified a combined total
463.8 socks – the original 316.8 stragglers plus an addition-
al 147 socks that were located during our search and seizure
mission – that have absolutely no match. They’re all going in
the garbage along with the three Cheerios that were behind
the couch. On the bright side, I suddenly realized that,
thanks to The Great Sock Hunt, my Pesach cleaning for this
year is done as well! ◆
106 u www.wherewhatwhen.com u
